Twilight Adventures, In The ZOO!
by Angelique.Is.Dreaming
Summary: Uh, so you won't get this. Me & Jacob, & Bre and Edward, along w/ the werewolves and vamps, go to the zoo! I think me and Breanne wrote this when we were on crack, haha.


**AN:** This is a random story but very awesome made by me and my very best friend Angelique (who is in love with Jacob Black) This story will most probably make no sense whatsoever to you, but we don't care! So, on with the story! YOU REALLY REALLY WON'T UNDERSTAND THIS. Oh, if you have seen this fic on brelovestwilight's page, and think I'm stealing it. I'm not, I'm the bestest friend named angelique she was talking about. OKAY, here we go!

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight, but we do own Bobo! And ourselves, and we own the fictional zoo with Shouka that whale that kills AKA a killer whale. Thats all.**

**Bre Pov**

Me, the Cullens, and all the werewolves were going to the zoo. Bobo's birthplace! We walked through the place like we owned it. Me and Edward were together, as were Angelique and Jacob.

"I have a question," Jacob stated.

"What?" I asked.

"Why are you called vegetarians if you eat animals?" The Cullens were stumped. Like me.

"Uhhh…." Before we could really answer, Jacob said," I dare you to suck the blood from veggietables!"

"Veggies don't have blood! Duh,"

"So? I dare you, Edward."

"Uhmm…"

"I SAID I FREAKING DARE YOU!"

"AND I FREAKING SAID VEGGIES DON'T HAVE BLOOD!" I yelled.

"Everybody just calm down!" Seth said, being the peacemaker he was.

"Let's settle this," Angelique said. And so they grabbed a bunch of carrots from the giraffe's food-thingy ( idk if they even have carrots x3 )

"Ok, Bre, lets do this," Ed stated.

" Whoa, whoa, whoa," Breanne said, "Jacob dared _you_. Right, Jake?" No one really knows why Jake didn't like Edward, But I guess we'll never know. Anyways, he must like me better, because he said, "Yup."

Edward raised the carrot to his mouth and. . .

**BARFEDEDDEDED!**

**(we don't really know why)**

**3rd person POV**

"Ewwww!" All of the werewolves and vampires shouted.

"Somebody clean that up!" Quil commanded, with his hand over his nose.

All of the werewolves whimpered. With their heightened sense of smell, the barf was burning their noses.

"WAIT!!" Alice yelled.

Everybody froze.

"I have seen the future!" She said.

"Honey, everybody know that you're physic." Jasper said.

"NO! I saw…THAT!"

She pointed at Embry as he went to get a worker to clean up the puke. He stepped in it and slipped, taking Jasper down with him.

THUD SMACK GROWL GAG

All of us, vampires and werewolves alike, busted out laughing. Seth laughed so hard he pissed in his pants. I'm sure he didn't feel any embarrassment because he was still laughing. And then Embry and Jasper…slipped in Seth's pee and fell on top of each other.

"Awkward…" Jasper said.

He felt Bre's emotion and what she wanted to be doing with him. His eyes got all lusty. "Uhmmm…" Embry said, still underneath Jasper. Jasper leaned forward to Embry and…

**CENCORED**

Alice fainted. And then…Emmett walked off. All the rest of us looked at them in shock. It was so wrong, but we couldn't…stop…watching. Then this random girl waked passed. We didn't pay attention to her, but Seth kept staring. He tried to get up, but slipped in the puke/piss and Jaspers drool from lust. Then he finally got up covered in all the grossnasty and ran after her. She watched him in disgust as he stopped her with his hand (covered in you-know-what )

"Hi, my name is— " Then Emmett came back, but with a giant hose. He turned it on, cutting off Seth's sentence. Then back to Jasper…

He and Embry were still…you-know-what-ing. Angelique and Jacob just kept staring.

"Is Embry enjoying that?" She whispered to Jake.

"Well, he hasn't imprinted yet, so you never know."

I nodded my head slowly.

"DEAR GOD!!" Angelique shouted.

Jasper plunged his tongue into…Embry's…GAHHH!!

"RUN AWAY!!" Breanne yelled, she went to move her feet, but she slipped in the barf/pee-pee mixture and brought Ed down with her. Now back to Seth, Emmett, and that one girl.

"EMMETT!" Seth roared. Em ran, cuz he didn't want Seth to phase in front of that girl, and knew he would follow him. Now back to the others…

Jasper still had his tongue in Embry's… ear. Alice was still unconscious, which didn't really make sense, cuz she's a vamp. Bre and Ed were still on the ground, trying to get up. Rosalie was looking in a mirror. The werewolves were looking at the lion exihbit.

Edward finally got up, then helped Bre up.

"Eugh. We need to get all this crap off of us!" Bre exclaimed. She and Edward thought. T

hen Edward said: "Lets jump in...

**SHOUKA'S SWIMMY POOL!"**

Angelique and Jacob also liked that idea and went with them, even though they weren't dirty. They left Jasper and Embry tounging and on top of each other, with Rosalie staring in her mirror and paying absolutly no attention to anybody but herself. So Bre, Ed, Lique, and Jake went to swim with Shouka(which is strange, because Shouka doesn't live at the zoo x3)

Meanwhile...

Seth was soaking wet, but he was still trying to make conversation with the girl, when some guy walked up. "Seth, this is my boyfriend, Stefan," she said. Seth cursed under his breath and growled. (Is there gonna be a showdown?)

The girls "boyfriend" is all: "I think Bobo has been rubbing off on me. Seth's hott." Then she was all x0 And then Seth was all: "I'm open to alternatives," and was staring at the guy like he was a piece of meat. (Vegitarian meat, becuase that would be cruel to the pups :)

Then they both completly ignored the girl, and Seth and Stefan started making out.

(Wow. The zoo brings out _alot_ of homoness.)

Back to Bre, Ed, Lique, And Jake...

They were all having a good time, but Bre and Edward were showing off, and swimming super fast. Back to Jasper and Embry...

**(extremely) CENSORED!**

Now back to Seth and those random people...

**MORE CENSORED-NESS!**

Geez, this whole story is just about censored. So back to Bre, Ed, Lique, and Jake...

So they were just swimming along, when there was a "HEY!" Uh-oh. Time to get out.

"Come back you convicts!"

"Start running faster!" Breanne yelled. Lique and Jacob were running too slow.

"One of you phase!" Edward shouted.

"But we have to be mad." Jacob stated.

"You should have eaten my throw-up! I heard thats what dogs do," he added. Jacob looke really mad, then he phased. Angelique jumped on top of him (ew) and we all took off running...

They went to go find Embry and Jasper, but they wouldn't come up for air. So Breanne, Edward, Angelique, and Jacob took drastic measures and...

We unleased the fury that was his wife (and Alice)

And they still didn't stop. So we left them. And Alice shot herself and dieded. :(

Was that a happy ending? Nobody knows...


End file.
